I’ve Been Everywhere, Man

A “How-To” Guide to the Great American Road Trip

I love driving. I love the open road. I love my big sky country and wide-open spaces. I love roadside attractions and small-town diners. I love sunsets and empty barstools. I love scenic overlooks and National Parks. I love my home. I love America.

There is much to be said about the horrors of the 20th century and the radical changes that have befallen America since that period. But one silver lining is the development of the Interstate Highway System. This colossal project began in 1956 under President Dwight D. Eisenhower and would take until 1992 to be officially completed. This daring project cost $618 billion (in 2023 dollars) and laid 48,756 miles of highway, extending to all four corners of the country. Crossing from one end of the country to the other, which once took months or even years, now could be completed in three days — truly a marvel of American engineering. With the new highway system, Americans could experience the majesty of their nation like never before. In just a matter of hours, your family could pack up the van and be hundreds of miles away. The National Parks, which were founded 50 years earlier under Teddy Roosevelt, were finally accessible to every American. And thus the Great American Road Trip was born.

I have been traveling across America for 30 years now. At this point, I’ve logged well over 100,000 miles behind the wheel, 10,000 of which in the first 6 months of this year alone, with at least another 4,000 coming up in the month of July. By the end of the month, I will have visited 41 states and dozens of National Parks and Monuments. In that time, I’ve seen some incredible sights, and I’ve made some amazing memories and a fair share of mistakes. All of it was worth it ten times over.

Devils Tower, Wyoming

Traveling and experiencing the beauty of America has been a major part of my online presence from the beginning, and I take great pride in seeing more of our guys taking their first step toward taking their own Great American Road Trip. However, this can be a very daunting task, particularly if you have not grown up taking road trips. Buckling down and driving for 14 hours straight requires a special mindset. Conducting your Great American Road Trip enjoyably, cost-effectively, and safely takes guidance. I’ll do my best to lay out some resources for you guys who are looking to start your Great American Road Trip. For starters, below I have a list of tips and tricks I have developed over my years of traveling. I strongly recommend my friend Aaron Clarey’s book Reconnaissance Man for a more in-depth guide of specific regions of the country. (Bonus Tip: Listen to your favorite podcasts while you drive. I myself recently listened, on double speed, to Black Pilled’s entire Pat-Con series in one drive.)

Why Not Just Fly?

This is a question I answer hundreds of times a year, and my answer is always: “America is too beautiful to experience from the air.” It’s a simple fact that the only true way to experience America is by car. Flying is indeed faster, or so you’d think — in our current era, thanks to the competency crisis, flights are both no longer cheap or timely in most cases. How many of you have suffered increased delays, in both frequency and duration, for your flights these days?

Putting aside time and costs, does anyone really enjoy flying? And let’s not forget the stress of flying. Is security going to make me miss my flight? Will this delay make me miss my connecting flight? What happens if they lose my bag? What if the things I want to bring on my plane are banned? What happens if they don’t have rental cars when I land? Maybe none of these problems occur, and maybe some of them do, but the theme across all of flying is: you are not in control. Every time you commit to flying, you are putting your fate in the hands of so many people, across many industries, to do their jobs correctly, efficiently, and safely. This is also excluding the drama of the flight itself. God help you if you sit next to a skunk or a land whale. Or the kid behind you who won’t stop crying. Or the inevitable cold you are going to catch two days later.

Now let all that sink in for a moment, and then think about this: aside from a catastrophic failure, which are easily avoided by planning ahead, I almost always know from the onset how long a trip will take and how much it will cost when I drive. I’m in control of the whole thing. I choose when to stop, when to go, when to hike, when to sleep, what I pack, who I see, everything. This honestly is more important to me than cost or speed. Control over my own destiny allows for more options and, crucially, serendipity. But more on that later.

Have a Plan

This is the Golden Rule of traveling. All of the other tips won’t matter unless you have this figured out. Have a plan. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It can even be quite malleable. But you need to have a plan. Where am I going? How long can I stay? What am I going to do while I’m there? How much can I afford? These are the initial questions to ask. If you don’t have these figured out, then do so immediately. Your goal in your Great American Road Trip is to arrive at your destination safely, efficiently, and affordably so that you can maximize your time doing whatever you want to do. Anything that brings you closer to that goal should be worked toward, and anything that hinders that goal should be avoided.

With your initial questions satisfied, now you have to plan for your destination. First, determine whether it’s even worth it for you to drive instead of fly. My default standard is to spend at least the same amount of time engaging in recreation as engaging in travel. And remember: you have to sleep, so the time spent traveling is not purely 1 to 1 with time engaging in recreation. If it takes me 4 hours each way to drive somewhere, then I need at least 8 hours of recreation for it to be worth it. And those numbers translate to a weekend trip or so. In plain English: as you progressively travel farther, you need to justify spending a lot more time at your destination. The last thing you want to do is drive 4 days across the country only to drive another 4 days back 36 hours later.

Lake Mead, Nevada

Your Car as a Bag of Holding

If you’ve ever played Dungeons & Dragons or any similar RPG, you are familiar with your standard-issue backpack that can somehow hold 3 sets of armor, 800 arrows, 100 lbs. of food, 37 potions, and a saddle for your horse, all while still allowing you to move easily. Or you can even be more audacious and purchase a Bag of Holding, where through magic you could hold an infinite number of items. This is what your car should be on your Great American Road Trip. Your car has space, and a lot of it at that. Make use of it. Just in the cab of my truck alone I have: a snow shovel, a 2x4, a set of jumper cables, a mini air compressor, a first aid kit, a tobacco pipe, a screwdriver set, a crescent wrench, a baseball glove, a poker chips set, a spare 9mm mag, a lighter, three different kinds of hats, two sets of sunglasses, two car chargers, a tape measure, a harmonica, and a compass. “It’s better to have and not to need, than to need and not to have.” I’m prepared for damn near anything, with plenty of room still for passengers.

Your car is totally in your control. You can stock it with whatever you want and organize it as you like. And again, going back to having a plan: you can plan ahead with what your Great American Road Trip needs, so maybe you should take that snow shovel out in the middle of summer. You can also bring items in your car that you can’t on a plane. You know, like bottles of water or a pocket knife. The car gives you options; use them to your advantage. In emergencies, you can even sleep in it should the need arise. And BTW: if you do try that, make sure you have a mosquito net; you’ll thank me later.

The Rules of the Road

Roadway etiquette is something that all of you need to know before embarking on your Great American Road Trip. This may sound childish and absurd, but hear me out. It’s not just where you drive that’s important, but how you drive. Don’t be zigzagging all over the place. Loops are the way to go on your Great American Road Trip. Also remember that the fast lane is for passing, not cruising. Best way to avoid a ticket is to avoid staying in the fast lane for too long. On the same topic of avoiding tickets, CRUISE CONTROL IS YOUR BEST FRIEND. I always set mine to 8 over the speed limit in most urban and suburban areas, and to 13 over in rural areas. You want to avoid the major reasons for getting a speeding ticket: 10 over and 15 over. Going 8 over won’t draw a cop’s attention, so he won’t waste his time unless you are acting stupid. On the note of acting stupid: don’t tailgate, don’t bob and weave through lanes like crazy, don’t honk your horn wildly or do anything else that is going to cause you problems. Let everyone else drive like a jackass; your Great American Road Trip is more important than a pissing match with some random idiot.

Moving on from how you drive, let’s make sure you know what you are driving on. Ideally, you don’t want to be looking at your phone all the time when you are going 80 mph, so you should be familiar with road signs. The three main colors you’ll see on the highway are: blue, green, and brown. Blue is going to be your amenities, such as lodging, food, gas, and rest areas. They are there for a reason, so use them. Simply reading a sign that informs you of a rest area 4 miles away will protect you from the BS of trying to find one on your GPS. Be mindful of your surroundings.

Green signs are your roadways, highways, and exits. If you are ever in doubt of which exit lane to get in, just follow the signs. Your GPS is going to get it wrong, and more often than not the signs actually do a great job of telling you which direction to go. If you know that you are heading in the direction of a big city, again, just follow the signs. I can’t tell you how many times my phone has told me to get in the right lane, but it’s actually referring to the NEXT right lane and not the current one I’m looking at. Use your best judgment, and more often than not you will be correct.

Brown signs refer to attractions like National Parks, campgrounds, museums, zoos, theme parks, and scenic views. And I can’t stress this enough: always stop at all scenic overlooks whenever possible. They are always worth it. Trust me, you can spare the 5 minutes to park your car, stretch your legs, and take a look at some of the most beautiful sights in the entire world.

Black Hills National Forest, South Dakota

The Rules of the Trail

Have the right gear. Have good shoes that fit well. Have a good backpack. If you decide to carry a firearm, bring the right holster for the job, and check your local laws for concealed carry. Have appropriate weather wear. You can never have enough water. Bring a map and compass when needed. When going on ANY long-term hike outside of cellphone range, tell someone where you are going. As absurd as it sounds, it’s better than getting into a 192-hour situation where you find yourself cutting off your arm with a pocketknife. And while getting pinned by a giant bolder is highly unlikely, it becomes more likely for you to get lost, get bitten by a snake, get attacked by another wild animal, or slip and break a bone. Almost all wilderness accidents can be prevented just by telling someone where you are.

New River Gorge, West Virginia

Finally, just have fun. Take some good photos, grab a souvenir, talk to other adventurers. I’ve met some very interesting people on my travels over the years. At this point, I have a person I know who I can crash with in basically every state. I’m not above couch surfing, especially given the rising hotel prices.

These are just some of the many tips that I can impart on you, Dear Reader, about the Great American Road Trip. Hopefully I’ve at least piqued your curiosity into trying one out for yourself. Do it. You won’t regret it. America is beautiful beyond words, and She is OURS. Now go out and enjoy it.